Overheard in New York
Overheard in New York, the website where people post snippets of conversations they catch in NYC, is old news, but I just ran across a post that a friend sent me a while ago -- it's brilliant:
As long as I'm at it, check the Current Favorites section for more gems like that. Like this:
And here are whole string of reasons I don't want automated trains without conductors (like on the 4/5/6 and L lines) that announce stops to replace the old subway trains:
And especially this:
And speaking of the subway:
Older woman: Excuse me, miss?
Younger woman: Yeah?
Older woman: Your veil, your burqa is very beautiful. I didn't know your people were allowed to wear it in bright colors.
Younger woman: It's not a burqa, it's a poncho. I'm Jewish. It's for the rain. I got it at TJ Maxx.
--53rd & 7th
Overheard by: Pam
As long as I'm at it, check the Current Favorites section for more gems like that. Like this:
Bag check guy: I want your bag.
Comic book chick: Pardon?
Bag check guy: You know the rules. Give me your bag.
Comic book chick: Sorry, I didn't know I had to check this.
Bag check guy: What did you think, that I'm just some crazy black man sitting up here harassing people?
Comic book chick: Could be.
Bag check guy: That's true.
--Forbidden Planet, 13th Street
And here are whole string of reasons I don't want automated trains without conductors (like on the 4/5/6 and L lines) that announce stops to replace the old subway trains:
Conductor: This is a Brooklyn bound B train. Like bitch.
--B train
Conductor: We are currently being held in the station because of some other A train fucking us all over.
--Uptown A train
Conductor: Never give up on life. Keep hope alive. This is 30th Avenue.
--N train, Astoria
Conductor: You can switch to the A train across the platform. However, I would much rather you stay on this train.
--Downtown C train, 14th St
And especially this:
Conductor: Okay, okay...all you white people get off the train here. That's right, hippies and hipsters. If you under thirty-five and white, you don't want to stay on this train no mo'. The next stop will be the ghet-to!
--Flatbush-bound 2 express train at Eastern Parkway/Brooklyn Museum
Overheard by: chagrined hipster
And speaking of the subway:
The subway doors open. A hobo enters, holding a bottle of windex in one hand and a tube of toothpaste in the other. He says: Which is the better time to read Dostyevsky? Winter?
He sprays the windex.
Hobo: Or Spring?
He squeezes toothpaste out of the tube.
Japanese girl: Spring!
Hobo: You are correct.
--F train
Overheard by: Pete Johnson
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