I’d like a plain omelet, no potatoes on the plate. A cup of coffee and a side order of wheat toast.

I’m sorry we don’t have any side orders of toast. I can offer you an English muffin or a coffee roll.

What do you mean you don’t have side orders of toast? You make sandwiches don’t you?

Would you like to talk to the manager?

You’ve got bread. And a toaster of some kind?


I don’t make the rules.

Okay, I’ll make it as easy for you as I can. I’d like an omelet, plain, and a chicken salad sandwich on wheat toast: no mayonnaise, no butter, no lettuce. And a cup of coffee.

A number two. Chicken salad sand. Hold the butter, the lettuce, the mayonnaise. And a cup of coffee. Anything else?

Yeah. Now all you have to do is hold the chicken, bring me the toast, and give me a check for the chicken salad sandwich and you haven’t broken any rules.

You want me to hold the chicken, huh?

I want you to hold the chicken between your knees.

You see that sign, sir? Yes, you all have to leave. I’m not taking any more of your smartness and sarcasm.

You see this sign?